Heeby Jeebies and Honey Beebies

Today I plunge a spoon into one of my weirder purchases.

"A kiwi?" you say.  "You need to get out more.  Kiwis are no longer exotic." 

Oh, but look at this kiwi. 

Doesn't it just give you the shivers? 

It's a mutant double kiwi. 

There was a kiwi stand at the farmer's market this weekend, and ALL the kiwis they were selling were these creepy Siamese double, triple and quadruple fruits. 

Ace was suspicious of their organicness, but I was under the impression the sellers billed themselves as merely "local." 

Although I don't know what NUCLEAR POWER PLANTS are in the area.

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I have also been following Chad's honey plan for beating springtime allergies. 

The honey lady - who, Chad tells us, occasionally masquerades as a cheese lady - at the farmer's market seemed to be familiar with his allergy plan. 

Her instructions were to take a teaspoon a day of the local honey at first, and build up your tolerance (to the honey?) - and eventually the local pollen (that went into the honey) won't bother you either. 

I can't imagine building up from a teaspoon of honey - a teaspoon already represents a huge jump from my prior honey consumption, which amounted to approx. 1 tablespoon per year, in the form of baklava.  How much honey can a person eat? 

I laughingly suggested to Ace I swap out honey for all the phony Gus and Hammer Gels we suck down at races.  He said our friend Lorraine actually does that.  And on reflection it does sound a little more wholesome than what I call the Space Food we usually consume.  Tell you what, I'll try that on my next long run and let you know how it works out.

Right there, at the honey stall,  I had honey on a toothpick - and immediately started sneezing.  Psychosomatic? 

Monday I had honey on saltine crackers and didn't notice any reaction either way.  Yesterday I brought the honeybear to work and had honey on a leftover bagel.  Mmm!  I was itchy in the evening after dinner.  Related? 

Today, I'm combining the honey plan with my mellow-out plan to drink more tea.  I can't really tell.  Oh wait, my nose...itchy?  Not that itchy.

The jury is still out. 

Maybe I'll have to make some baklava.

Comments

[Chad]

That Kiwi looks like something you should hang from your rear-view mirror.

I found a summary online of a clinical trial in which they debunked the local honey theory. According to the results, local honey = non-local honey = sugar gel placebo. Oh well.

[boots]

Between the suggestively shaped kiwis and all that extra honey, maybe there's a fruit porn opportunity staring you in the face here...

My dog takes fish oil pills to help control her allergies. Doesn't eliminate them, but does cut down on the itchy ears and time in between Benadryl doses. And it makes her coat shiny. You can't go wrong with a shiny coat.

[Kelli]

I think you should pour some of that honey on your teenage mutant ninja kiwi and kill two birds with one stone!

[TasterSpoon]

Interesting, Boots! *I've* been taking fish oil pills for my heart or my joints or...I forget why. It was in a magazine. You can see the corner of the bottle in the last kiwi picture. I haven't noticed allergy ups or downs either way, but haven't looked for correlation, either.

Then again, I'm not very consistent about taking them. Every time I burp, it's like I had a mackerel for lunch.

And Kelli, you may be on to something. At worst, the immunity boosting honey will cancel out the residual radioactivity of the kiwi.

[Vaguely Urban]

I buy unsweetened eurotrash delicious yogurt, and eat it for breakfast drizzled with a (you guessed it) teaspoon of honey and some slivered almonds or perhaps some pistachios. SCRUMPTIOUS.

Probably Dave (aka the whore of the farmers' market) will gladly buy me some local honey this w/e to replace the honey bear I've been using.

My sinuses are on fire these days.

[TasterSpoon]

Sounds like Dave is less of a whore and more of a john.

They're all, "Heyyyy, Big Boy, I've got some big, red strawberries here that may or may not have fallen off a delivery truck. Wanna try? They're reallllly juuuuuicy..." Waggle, waggle, pinch, drip.

And he's all, "Enough, ladies, heh heh, I'm looking for some wild-caught salmon today, heh heh, if you know what I mean. Can you hook me up? Wait - Are those nut butters new? I haven't seen THEM before..."