Taster Spoon

Primarily because of the sesame seed duvet

Did you know the Hamburger Bed is my friendster?  Or Facebook stalkee, whatever.

It totally almost made a headline.

http://www.oddee.com/item_96623.aspx

I'm actually a big fan of the molecular bed now.  I wonder if it is accepting Friendsters. 

Cap that Recap!

I know I owe alls y'all a cereal recap of my Floridian weekend.  I got back yesterday and my head's a swirling confusion of the faces of friends I see once a year and those of new friends; flat tires and broken collarbones;  birthdays and Dog the Bounty Hunter; and entire stores full of trashy, sexist crap.  (Coffee mugs shaped like breasts, refrigerator magnets in the likeness of a woman's behind...I wanted to say something to the cashier at one of these stores about the prevalence of the word "slut" on the T-shirts she was selling, but didn't know what to say and figured she didn't make stocking decisions anyway.)

But did you see how I slipped away unnoticeably?  I posted more consistently while on this trip out of town than I usually do when I'm home.  I used the Typepad "Publish On..." feature, pre-planning topical posts before I went on vacay.  So when I was standing at the Tampa baggage carousel, I smiled as I looked at the "Ladies and Gentlemen" bathroom signs at the airport.  And the next day I specifically checked to make sure the bouncy shark was the same as last year. 

Is that cheating, NaBloPoMo-wise?  Not that I signed up for that; like BTE, I didn't want to set any bars for myself I'd have to try to meet.  Low, low, low expectations is my theme for November. 

Like yesterday.  I purposely planned to come home early on Sunday so I'd feel like I had a little bit of "weekend" before work.  The weather was perfect, and Ace and I talked about playing tennis, but instead went to dim sum and then Old Navy to get jeans because he hates that my current pairs either a) ride way too low ("Brazilian cut," according to the salesman) or have a hole in the butt (nowhere good, though).  Neither of us got jeans, but he got khakis and a sweet button down shirt that goes with jeans, and I got two pairs of white corduroys (one's going back) and an unnecessary $12 fleece.   Then we stopped in at the wine store where our neighbor works and let him talk us into spending $75 on wine.  And lo, it was too dark to play tennis.  So he did some laundry, I played on HGTV's website (my new favorite channel, replacing the Food Network), we ate leftovers and went to bed.  An excellent use of the afternoon.

So in lieu of real content in this here post, I will make some up - my tip o' the week!  Here it is: when planning a vacation, try not to return from your travels the last day before you have to go to work.  Give yourself a day of buffer to settle back in.  Then you'll feel happy and rested on Monday!

Also, travel east, so that when you return, on Monday it feels like you slept in an extra three hours.

Obsession

What do you do when you're tired of the whole triathlon scene?  You know you've got races coming up, but you just can't motivate to get out there and train.  Let's face it, you're not good enough that the prospect of podium places, medals or sponsorships dangles before you.  You're just in the sport because you like the excuse to be active, and you like the opportunity to test yourself every now and again.  But when the juices aren't flowing, and you start to think, "What's the difference?", how do you motivate?  You could join a club workout.   You could phone some friends.  You could look up the programs other people are doing.  Or you could sit on your butt.  But you haven't done enough this year to claim with a straight face that you're recovering from anything; annoyingly, you don't have any injuries forcing you to sit out; and your next race is too far away to talk a good taper game.

Why don't you try a little self obsession? 

Despite its limited market, Dave's site is easily the best triathlon site I've ever seen. 

It's unassuming at first.  Type in your name, it responds with a list of all the area races you've done lately.  Convenient, but no big deal.  You probably keep a list of results written in pencil in a drawer at work anyway.  Race names link to their websites - that's handy.  But it gets better.

Click on a race, it gives you numerical and graphic breakdowns of competitors and their performances.  (For instance: Auburn's World Toughest Half is a great place to meet men!  Two boys for every girl!  And the fastest cyclist went twice as fast as the slowest.  Clicking on 'details' shows you how results were distributed.)

Still you're unimpressed.  "That's neat," you say, "in a meta way.  But what about ME?  I already know I'm in the middle of the pack."

Go back to the regular search, search for a name, then CLICK ON THE NAME.  It will take your breath away. 

This site answers all the questions that you secretly wonder but aren't sufficiently geeky to work out on your own.  Such as: What really is my best sport?  How would I have done if I hadn't aged up?  How many places did my abominable transitions at Vineman cost me?  (Answer: 26.)  The questions are endless, and Dave's anticipated most of them. 

I find it mind expanding and motivational to realize how close I was to, say, hitting the top 10%, or to see in black and white how much my bike is holding me back.   It's a fascinating site, geared mainly towards the competitive personality (because of course, much of the analysis digs into your relative performance) - but can eat up a good hour and help you chart out what you're going to focus on in the off-season.  Motivation in a box! 

Let's face it, the unexamined race is not worth running.

Portion Control

I was thinking about why an entire plate of tiny cupcakes would disappear faster than a plate of big cupcakes at work.  You'd think the necessity of repeated trips would slow intake.  However, I think most people faced with a buffet of tiny things might end up eating more than people addressing a buffet of larger portions. 

One, I think more people walking by are inclined to take one (who otherwise wouldn't help themselves at all), because it's only a tiny cupcake.

Two, you don't notice how they add up.  One bite is nothing, and a lot of nothings add up to nothing!  But when you face a great big serving you're very aware that you're about to eat a plateful, and that it's not dinnertime yet.

Three, I think people have no idea how to convert mini versions of regular foods into full sized ones.  I certainly don't. 

Do you know how many mini marshmallows are equivalent to a full-sized one?  Ten!  It doesn't seem right, but that's what the bag says. 

How about how many doughnut holes to a doughnut?  I think it's probably far fewer than I hope, like 3 or something.  Plus factor in the larger surface area for a higher fat percentage, probably.  Does anybody know?  When I do a Google search I just get a lot of articles on problems with Medicare.  Maybe I'll try Ask.com.  They seem to be advertising heavily these days.

Ooh!  That's pretty neat!  As well as providing the usual list of websites when I asked, "How many doughnut holes to a doughnut?", Ask provided category suggestions for narrowing your search:  (Who invented the doughnut?  History of doughnuts.  Doughnut recipes.) AND for broadening it: (Why do doughnuts have holes?  Why are there 18 holes on a golf course?  Why do dogs smell funny when they get wet?).

They may have to work a little on that last one.

YouTube

I'm testing to see whether I can link to a YouTube video some friends of mine put out.  They have a wonderful series called "How to Behave."  Check it out, check em out, check out Dovetail, their thingymajigger.